Tuesday, October 15, 2013

I Like Chinese Food!

It’s too soon.

Haven’t we all JUST begun to heal from the worst national tragedy to ever fall upon this great nation? To hit us again with another terrorist act is just too much.

No, I’m not talking about anything the Taliban might cook up. The insidious plot that I’M referring to was hatched right here in the good old U.S.A.

I am, of course, talking about the malignant tumor that was thrust upon us two years ago, Rebecca Black’s hit song, Friday.

Ah, who could forget when a young Miss Black bestowed upon us what can only be described as THE WORST FUCKING SONG EVERY WRITTEN!

Ah, maybe I’m being too hard on it. After all, which one of CAN’T relate to those immortal words, “Kickin’ it, Kickin’ it, YEAH!”

Ok, I’m standing by my initial assessment. It’s the worst song ever written.

Or, is it?

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Alison Gold and her new video which is currently burning up Youtube, Chinese Food.

Did anyone else just sit through that entire fucking mess?

After watching that, I can honestly now give Rebecca Black some props. Sure, Friday sucked Donkey Balls, but at least it wasn’t fucking racist to boot! Giant Panda Bears….chicks in Kabuki makeup…. Are you FUCKING kidding me?

And if you have a keen eye, you can no doubt spy that the same dude wrote and produced both songs. It’s the rapper dude in the middle of each song, in case you couldn’t figure it out. His name is Patrice Wilson and if he is NOT being punched in the balls with a crowbar at this very minute, there is something very, very wrong with the universe.


Yvonne said...

How oh how am I going to get back the few minutes it took me to read this??? ha! I hate that stupid song "Friday" but that ignorant and equally stupid video win, hands down.

MarkD60 said...

I couldn't get through either song. But the thought occurred to me that neither would be too bad without sound.

Slyde said...

yvonne: it does, right? its so bad that i keep having to watch it again.... which is the point, i guess.

mark: Are you telling me slyly that you're attracted to 13 year old girls?