Tuesday, December 04, 2012

The Cars


My neighbors are fucking killing me.

There are 2 homes directly across the street from me.  They belong to two sisters, and their respective families.

House # 1 is occupied by one sister, her husband, their 2 kids, their tenant, and her boyfriend.

Each one of them has their own car.  And just to top it off, the husband has a second car…  A sweet looking vintage Mustang that he has restored.

House # 2 is occupied by the other sister, her husband, their 3 kids, and THEIR tenant.

Each one of them has THEIR own damn car, too.  Plus, Husband # 2 owns a delivery business, so he often has 2 small trucks that he parks in his driveway.

Now, I’m not a math whizz, and lord knows that I don’t have enough fingers for me to do some PROPER counting, but the last time I checked, that was 15 FUCKING CARS that are parked directly across the street from me!

And, since none of us has the last name of ‘Rockefeller’, you would be correct in assuming that neither of them have a driveway NEARLY large enough to accommodate this travelling road show.

So, they fill up their driveways, and then the runoff cars are parked up and down the length of the block.  When their kids have friends over (which is often), they merrily continue the cavalcade with THEIR damn cars up and down the block, on either their side of the street, or lined up in front of my house.

I’m not the kind of person who really gives a shit what people do with their own stuff, but when you park your fucking cars directly across from my damn driveway, it gets my goat.  I have to make a fucking 6 point turn just to get out of my driveway so I can go get a fucking Slurpee.

And I NEED my damn Slurpee.

It’s driving me crazy. 

I swear, one day I am going to just lose it and peel out of my driveway doing 50 in reverse and plow into the lot of them.

That’ll show ‘em!

10 comments:

B.E. Earl said...

You're an angry elf.

vixen kitten said...

I love knowing I'm not the only one who gets pissed about shit like this!

Happy Mommy said...

I'm getting my kid a SLURPEE machine for Christmas. You should look into getting one for yourself. :-)

MarkD60 said...

That's why God gave us Nuclear Weapons.

Choleesa said...

throw some nails out there, when youve pulled in the driveway for the night...
then have them towed as abandoned cars..

Yvonne said...

No need to go mess up your car or get your thong in a wad, do what I did. After numerous occasions of my next door neighbor and my across the street neighbor blocking my driveway due to all their chirrens and friends and family visiting their respective homes, I'd finally had enough and went a knockin' on their doors. I politely but ever so sternly told them that if they continued to block my driveway, I would have no choice but to call the cops on their asses. They didn't look too happy, but I've not had any issues with them since. If I do, I'm going all Godfather on them and busting out the horse's head. :)

2abes said...

Do you have a paint ball gun? Sounds like fun to me!

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Leeann said...

I had a neighbour once whose guests always parked outside my house. It was a little annoying as I thought WTF there is parking outside the person you are visiting, why are you parking in front of my house? Anyway I was really mad later when several friends hadn't been dropping in to see me as they usually did. When I asked them why they said, Oh I saw your already had a visitor so I didn't want to intrude!

Maybe you should organise a lot of your friends to come over and park in the street just before all of your neighbours usually come home (I'm assuming that they have jobs)If you did this a few times they might get the message!

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