Friday, December 09, 2011

HuddyCall

You would never ever EVER think it by looking at my killer good looks, rock hard abs, and 12 inch dong, but I’m getting old.

How am I starting to come to this very sad realization?

I blame my grandfather.

Let me explain……

When I was a kid, I always considered Grandpa, God Bless him, to be old. But it wasn’t because of his actual age that I thought of him that way…..

It was because of the fact that he could never get ANYONE’S name right.

He would often confuse one pet with another. Family member’s names were often interchangeable. Once when he was calling me to dinner, he yelled out the dog’s name.

I didn’t take it personally, though. After all, he was old.

And now, Fuck it all to Hell, I’M starting to do it, too.

Since we got the puppy, it seems like my “Golden Girls”-like mind just can’t grasp the concept of having to remember ONE more new name, and now all the names that I DO have stuffed into my brain are all spilling out all over the place.

I keep calling the dog by the cat’s name, and vice versa. I’d say I do this about 90 percent of the time, now. Shit, even if I picked a RANDOM pet’s name every time, I’d only be getting it wrong 50% of the time!

And now, I have started to take my senility to the next level…

Last night I called my son by the dog’s name.

We all laughed it off, but deep down, I took a good look at myself and saw my grandfather laughing down from Heaven at me.

This shit needs to stop before I fall further down the road to adult diapers.

Because let me tell you, if I slip up and call Friz by the dog’s name, I will be in for one major ass-whuppin’.

One more thing that I’ve noticed about myself that confirms that I am turning in to my grandfather….

Huddycall.

I’ve started saying “Huddycall”.

Whenever my grandfather didn’t know the name of something, he’d call it a huddycall. He’d say, “Go down in the basement and get me the huddycall”. Then I’d say, “You mean the screwdriver, grandpa?”. And he’d say, “Yeah, that!”.

I always just thought that huddycall was some funny name he’d made up for himself, or he was just mispronouncing “what do ya call it”….

Until today. I just looked up “Huddycall” in the Urban Dictionary and found:

Huddycall: A word common among the coal region in Northeastern PA. A word used as a filler when you can't remember what you were thinking of.

Which makes sense, kinda, since my grandpa grew up in Brockton, Mass.

But it IS nice to know that he wasn’t just spouting jibberish.

Cause THAT would have meant he was probably crazy, and that shit can run in the family, yo…..

21 comments:

Annabelle said...

Oh shit. If this is a sign of old age, then I've been old since I was 22.

Names always come out of my mouth wrong. So does he and she when I am telling a story.

And my HuddyCall? That's a DooHickey.

Slyde said...

doohickey? NOW you sound like you're from the roaring 20's!

sybil law said...

Huddycall? That's new to me! I just call it the "thingamajig oh come on you know what the fuck I mean!"
I call Gilda the wrong names, too. If that means I'm getting old, well - I'm in some good company.

B.E. Earl said...

My father used to just snap his fingers, point and say things like "you know...the, um, the, um, the, um..." until I finally guessed what he was talking about.

Watching Jeopardy! with him was fun too.

Slyde said...

sybil: the BEST company!

earl: yeah, my dad does that alot too...

MarkD60 said...

Your Grandfather probably got it from his Grandfather.

My Grandfather was my favorite relative and I try to be like him all I can.

Bouncin' Barb said...

Oh my poor Slyde! I think you can rest easy a little bit. Cut yourself some slack. It's probably from the LI water that you drink or the NY air pollution. I call them "thingies". Great post!

Susan Higgins said...

I had this happening to me... Then I stopped eating wheat gluten products and corn syrup. My mind fog went away. Forty's not old.

meleah rebeccah said...

Oh Sylde, you make me laugh. And yes, getting older sucks.

AlleyCat said...

Your not the only one mate!

Doo-hickey thing-a-ma-gig.......whatsamacallit.....

Heff said...

Hmmm....can't for the life of me Remember what my comment was gonna be....

Slyde said...

mark: as do i. every day.

barb: hey now! LI water is quite tasty!

sue: ive been kicking around the idea of cutting out glueton.. seriously.

meleah: it does, doent it?

alley: doo-hickey works....

heff: what were we talking about again?

The Accidental Somebody said...

If a bad memory is a sign of getting old, then shit I've been aging since I was nine. I'm sure you're not "getting old," and instead are the young strapping hottie you've always been!

Slyde said...

accidental: see? thats why i love you.. the great compliments.

p.s. did you take the commenting off of your blog? i couldnt comment today

Tracy said...

I have 3 daughters and always call them by the others name.
Now if I had a boy maybe that would be different ;)
I guess I can blame my hubby for that one ;)

I am going to miss Marlene's blog as well :(

A Daft Scots Lass said...

I used "thingamabob" a lot! I think its just a big part of being a parent, mixing up the kids names with the pets and the hubby and versa vice.

I NEVER blame my age!

Malka said...

If I can't think of a name for something I call it a thingydoo. I've also been guilty of calling my sister by my dog's name. Something tells me she doesn't appreciate being called "Bunny".

radioactive girl said...

I think it comes from lack of sleep and lots of grown up stress. I am the same way, I can't remember anything. In fact I call my kids "honey" or "sweetie" because if I don't, although I know their names, I will call them by half of a siblings name and then half of theirs as I remember it and who the name goes with. It has been so bad that they laugh and tease me about their combined names.

Marlene said...

Dude, even though I've stopped blogging, I intend to drop by and amuse you with my presence from time to time. Your posts are just too entertaining to miss. ;)

Slyde said...

Tracy: word. She's a peach.

daft: i probably shouyldnt, either...

radio: yeah, my son has been giving me all sorts of shit when i call him the wrong name... he thinks its a hoot

marlene: you'd better! and i dont believe you will be gone long. not for one minute....

Jill/Twipply Skwood said...

Oh I LIKE that one! Huddycall. :-)

Here's the thing though - I don't think it's senility or old age, it's just that you haven't had the dog for very long. If you'd have gotten the dog six years ago, you'd have probably started all this way back then.

At least, I've been calling my boy by my brother's name forever. Normally I don't exchange for pets though.