Monday, May 16, 2011

Kokomo

“We'll get there fast
And then we'll take it slow”

I must really be in love with all of you.

Here I am, frantically finishing up my work so I can jet off to the tropics for a much-needed vacation, and what do I decide to do? Why, give you all one last post to let you know why you won’t be hearing from me for a bit.

That really IS commitment. You would think, with ME being so serious about our relationship, at least ONE of you would have banged me by now. I mean, really, how much work am I supposed to put into this relationship before I start getting some dividends? (p.s. and by ‘dividends’, that’s my coy way of saying ‘hand-job’)

Anyway, I know that for SOME people, vacation is a time of scenic bus tours, frantic scheduling, and waking up early to see the sun rise, but that’s just NEVER going to be ME.

No, for me, a REAL vacation is a time when I can lie in the sand, order a girl-drink that comes in a big hollowed-out coconut with a big fruity umbrella, buy some Ganja from a local, and let my washboard abs bake and bronze in the Caribbean sun. And I must say, I can get QUITE dark if I put my mind to it. It’s a by-product of all of that hot Sicilian blood boiling thru my privates.

Anyway, that’s my idea of an ideal vacation, and THAT’S exactly what I’ll be doing for the next week or so. It’s ME time, and woe be unto anyone who attempts to fuck with it.

Have a great week, people. If I deem you worthy, I may treat you all with a picture of me in my speedo upon my return.

26 comments:

Joe Calle said...

As there still seems to be some confusion as to my intentions...I offer this repost:

Alas, it seems my fun has come to it's conclusion. What started out being, as Mary would say, "I'm fucking with you, Slyde" has crossed the threshold of good natured "go fuck yourself, self absorbed blogging duechebags" into apparent Fatal Attraction stalking fear causing our hero to check his stewpot for fuzzy little bunnies.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xrrErscRQco

Sooooo, I'm onto the next worthy cause. But as I bid you adieu, I am somewhat dissapointed at the lack of sluething ability displayed by the Great Slyde and his merry minions. The genesys of my mission could very easily be traced to a previous blog, namely, "Bloggers are Spitefull".

Oh, and 1 more thing "Brandy Rose" looks fucking hot in her profile pic...just sayin

Mrs. Hall said...

oh. order a drink for my Slyde!

yeah tropical drink laced vacations!

Slyde said...

joe: i know the post, but i'm not getting how its relevant. I guess i'm think

and yes, Brandy is quite the hottie

Holly: i'm on it!

Susan Higgins said...

Enjoy your vacation.. Hope the Guardian Angels of drinking bless you with hangover free days and nights.

Happy Mommy said...

I live on white sandy beaches where the booze comes in sand pails. Maybe you should visit me? I'm very good at "dividends."

Chris H said...

Well I hope Fizz and the kid get to go to!

Candy's daily Dandy said...

Hot Damn! Have a ball dude.

I'll be waiting for the Speedo picture...

Nat said...

Lucky sod! Enjoy...

Annabelle said...

Cheers and good times to you.

Im outtie come Saturday, save some beach and booze for me.

XxX
a

Jill/Twipply Skwood said...

Have a GREAT time!!!!!!!

sybil law said...

You lucky bastage!!!
Have a fabulous time! Your idea of a vacation pretty much is my ideal. Sooo jealous!

Marlene said...

Have a blast, dude! I'm jealous!!!

Malka said...

Completely off topic here, but thanks for recommending A Game of Thrones. I bought a set of paperbacks on amazon and am really enjoying reading it!

AlleyCat said...

Have a Fab holiday mate - frolic away & enjoy happy hour!!!!!!

Evil Twin's Wife said...

Enjoy your time on vacation! I'm sending beautiful weather vibes your way. We'll miss you, but I bet you come back with some great material - I mean, all your writing is great, but vacations can put some extra zing in every day life. :-)

radioactive girl said...

A vacation sounds wonderful right now. Have a great time!

MarkD60 said...

That's why I live here, every minute I'm not working, I'm on Vacation!

Bouncin' Barb said...

I hope that you find that nirvana on the beach. Have fun. See you when you get back.

meleah rebeccah said...

Awesome! Have a wonderful time. Can't wait to hear all about your vacation when you return!

Faiqa said...

That's exactly my idea of a vacation, but it never ends up that way. I always end up programming an agenda into my calendar. Because everyone ELSE whines about "what do we do now" and I just want them to leave me the hell alone.
So. Have a good time.
Also, I hate you. That's the jealousy, feel free to ignore it.

Raquel's World said...

Yahoo for you! Thanks for letting us know. I hate when bloggers fall off the face of the earth.

Brandy Rose said...

A speedo eh? That could make my day.

Cocaine Princess said...

Have a fantastic time on your vaycay! Go and get your tan on! Look forward in reading all about it in your future posts and don't forget the pics! Safe Travels.

B.E. Earl said...

Good riddance...

Bouncin' Barb said...

There's something about you on my blog!!! Check it out.

Kaylen said...

I would go on vacation more if I could be assured there were such fine specimen of men like you waiting on the beach, with such amazing good looks and wow, those abs....but alas, there just aren't a lot like you out there.