I really don’t want to turn this site into “Slyde’s Microwave Blog”, but I just had to relate this story that happened to me recently.
I went to the cafeteria to get my lunch out of the refrigerator so I could nuke it in the microwave. When I opened the door to the microwave, I noticed that someone else’s lunch (a TV dinner) was sitting in there. Apparently, someone put their lunch in, set the timer, and walked away for a few minutes while it cooked.
No biggie. Happens all the time. I simply took the person’s lunch out of the microwave, placed it on the counter, put my own lunch in, and set the timer. While it was cooking, I decided to run upstairs to get a can of soda.
Now, I’m gonna stop my story here for a second. Was taking this person’s food out of the microwave a big no-no in microwave etiquette that I’m not aware of? Seriously…. Is what I did REALLY a big fucking deal to anyone?
Because, let me tell you…. It was a BIG fucking deal to THIS bitch.
I knew something was up when I walked back into the cafeteria. There were about 5 people looking around uncomfortably, and this one bitch who I have never seen before was ranting about SOMETHING.
The first thing that I thought of was that my lunch must have somehow exploded in the microwave and made a mess that someone else was cleaning up. That was the only thing I could think of, because the way this loon was screaming and cursing had me at a loss.
But no, as soon as I got closer, and all eyes in the cafeteria turned to me, THIS is what I heard:
“Who the FUCK would touch another person’s lunch in the microwave? I can’t fucking STAND someone else handling my food! Now I’m completely disgusted. I can’t eat this! I CAN’T!”
And with that, she took her TV dinner and threw it into the garbage!
Now, I’m all for having it out with obnoxious people, but this chick honestly threw me for a loop with how she was acting. I kept thinking:
“She CAN’T be talking about me… let me just get my lunch and get the hell outta here.”
So, I sauntered up to the microwave, popped the door open, and took out my food. As I did so, I could see her eyes burning a hole into me. As soon as I grabbed my food, she said:
“OOOOOH! AND HERE HE IS RIGHT NOW! THANKS FOR RUINING MY LUNCH! I GUESS I’LL STARVE NOW BUT AS LONG AS YOUR SHITTY LUNCH IS NICE AND WARM THAT’S ALL THAT MATTERS, RIGHT?”
As I said, normally I would have laced into her something righteous, but I’ve really tried to curtail my temper over the years when it comes to work. I had some incidents in my younger days when I blew my cool at work, and it never ended well, so now really I try to let most things slide.
But this witch would NOT shut the fuck up.
She kept up with the insults the entire time I collected my lunch, and continued with them while I walked out of the cafeteria. I never said a word to the chick.
But OH MY GOD did I want to wring her damn neck.
So, my question to you all…. Is what I did a no-no? Or was this chick off her meds?
p.s. She wasn’t hot at all. I wouldn’t even THINK about banging her. That may NOT be an important part of this story….
…. Or it just might be the most important part of all.