Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Bloggers Are Spiteful

Not ALL of us, but yeah, SOME of us are.

Don’t get me wrong… I’ve met many great people from my 5+ years of running this site. I’ve received heart-felt letters, gotten gifts in the mail, offers to meet up with some of you in real life. Hell, some of you have even sent me naughty pictures of yourselves. Those were, or course, my favorite. You little minxes, you…..

Where was I?

Oh yeah. Most of you are aces, but every once in a while, I’m reminded of just how catty and childish some bloggers can be.

Here are a few of the catty situations I’ve been involved in during my time running this site:

- I used to go to this one person’s site quite often. I would comment there on just about every post she wrote. One time, in her comments, she mentioned that she never commented on MY site because I didn’t have enough followers and it wasn’t worth her time. What the Hell? Like the only reason she left comments anywhere was so she could self-promote! Bitch.

- There are some people who will ONLY leave a comment on your site if you FIRST leave a comment on theirs. It’s a quid pro quo thing, I guess, but people can be REALLY catty about it. Sometimes I test my theory by not leaving a comment on their site for weeks, and I likewise don’t hear a peep from them. Then, I drop in to leave a quick comment and sure enough, within 24 hours they reciprocate.

- I had one person once send me an angry letter, giving me all kinds of shit because she was ‘following’ me, and I had yet to ‘follow’ her. At first, I thought it was a joke, but the letter was quite serious, and REALLY fucking nasty. I take pride in the fact that I was calm and controlled enough to not tell her to go eat me. In fact, I never responded at all. Hopefully, she sat there stewing as to why I never replied, or if I had even gotten the email at all.

Speaking of ‘following’, doesn’t it drive you crazy when you lose a random follower and you don’t know who it is? A few weeks ago, I went from 126 to 125 and for the damn life of me I couldn’t remember who suddenly thought I sucked enough to drop me. Then the next day I went back to 126, only to drop again to 125 the day after that.

I really don’t think I look at those numbers all too much, but I’d be lying if I said it didn’t irk me when someone just up and leaves me, without even the prospect of goodbye sex. I mean, why the Hell did they leave me all of a sudden? They obviously liked what I wrote at one point enough that they wanted to read more. Did I suddenly start to suck? Because I call bullshit on that one…. I’m pretty positive that my recent posts are just as sucky as they’ve ALWAYS been. I’m pretty consistent that way.

Clearly, my goal to have 1,000 followers by tomorrow is NOT going well. Never mind that I just made that goal up about 30 seconds ago… I’ve worked hard and I deserve to be happy, dammit!

44 comments:

Paticus said...

Well, i just started following you a few minutes ago(see that guy in the trenchcoat? Yeah, I'm behind that guy), so you are one step closer to 1000 followers.
Oh, and why haven't you started following me yet?

Mrs. Hall said...

"I used to go to this one person’s site quite often. I would comment there on just about every post she wrote. One time, in her comments, she mentioned that she never commented on MY site because I didn’t have enough followers and it wasn’t worth her time. What the Hell? Like the only reason she left comments anywhere was so she could self-promote! Bitch."



sorry about that. but, now that you have 16 followers I can comment and plug my site. all fixed!

SK Waller said...

I'll never leave you, snookums.

Seriously, I try not to care when people just up and leave, but it's curious. What did I do for crap sake? As for the quid pro quo commenting, I usually just tell myself that they forgot about me until my comment reminded them that commenting is a fun and nice thing to do. But I'm not one of those who comments just for the hell of it, or out of habit. Because I write every minute of every day, I comment only when the subject interests me or otherwise moves me. Is that bad? If so, I'll change. Really, I will!

Bailey Schneider said...

Wow. Seems petty to me!

Well, I'm glad you visited my blog and left a comment because it has introduced me to yours :-)

Hope you'll become a regular!

Vanilla Blonde

Slyde said...

paticus: i'll get on that RIGHT NOW! :)

holly: ok, that works....

Steph... im mostly the same way, EXCEPT in those cases where i know people really take it to heart if i dont drop a comment. Usually thats the case on new bloggers, or people without alot of followers...


baily: i liked your site quite alot. i'll be back!

2abes said...

Will you and earl please kiss and make up. You shouldn't bring this blogger squabbling to your site. If you offer the right incentive you quite possibly could make 1000 followers by tomorrow.

Slyde said...

abes: im game for anything...

Lotus07 said...

While I don't have the legions following me like you do (my 40 is just fine with me). I have run into the same catty bitchiness that you have.

Once a long time ago on MySpace (what was I thinking) you used to be able give people 'stars' for their post...something like one to three. If they were really good, I would leave three stars. But if they were meeeeh, I would leave one just to let them know I read it. Boy, somee folks took it as a real insult to get just ONE fucking star. It was akin to giving them an "F" and then spitting on them. What a bunch of ego damaged losers.

B.E. Earl said...

I got rid of my "Followers" widget over a year ago. I found that I just didn't care about the number of people reading my drivel. I mean, I dig the people that currently read and comment, but if my readership doesn't expand very much over time...I'm okay with that.

And I've gotten those emails and comments before. And that is the BEST way to get me to never go to your site again. Unless it's to make fun of you.

Paula said...

ergh no. Sounds like poop. I also hate that if you comment I'm committed to comment. I stopped blogging so I don't care so much anymore- comment where I want to comment and all. Mostly I read and move on.

I was one of the "lost" followers. I stopped using blogger. I'm following via bloglovin' now. I have a blogger account- it's just bloglovin allows me to organize the blogs i read better. although this site is also trying to get on my wrong side.

So you don't suck. Bloggers lack of allowing organization for wannabe- type As such as I is the thing that sucks.

Paula said...

by "this site" i refer purely to bloglovin'

saw the ambiguity. just correcting myself.

Annabelle said...

I'm so uncool. I never knew the following was so crucial to some.
I would just cut and paste the address of the blogs I liked into my subscription feeder and go on about my business.
I've tried to make the effort to follow folks I read daily though, you know to let them know I care.

As far as comments go, I love commenting on sites that don't get a lot of them. Why would I want to be number 43 on the list? If I can put my two cents in somewhere it can be appreciated, I'd much rather do that. Also, if I don't feel I have anything of value to say, I don't bother. I'm not a fan of the comment for comments sake.

I hope it's not a snobby quid pro quo thing, but yes I do try to make the effort to come say hello to people who've been kind enough to do the same over at my place. Regardless, if I like the content I'll return, read my stuff or not.

Wondering - what are you thoughts on author replies to comments? I notice you always make the effort, and I try to do the same. Usually though I'm sneaking on my phone and don't always have time. Do you think it has negetive reprocussions to not reply to comments?

Slyde said...

lotus: well, im glad to know that its not just me.

earl: YOU make fun of me? never...

paula: ah HA! so it WAS you! how could you have left me that way ... sniff :(

anna: honestly, i dont think too much of them. I always appreciate when someone responds to my comments, but since i rarely go back to check on someones site after i comment, i feel bad that they probably commented on what i wrote and i never saw it.

I go back and forth on replying here... for a long time i did it, and then for a long time i didnt. Since my web site has been fixed, ive been doing it again, but i honestly feel like my replies are kinds meaningless...

sybil law said...

Bloggers - a bunch of narcissistic, whiny bitches.
Except us.
Of course.
:)
And I responded to 17 comments today only to have Blogger screw it up. I give up.

Susan Higgins said...

There's a song that comes to mind by Couto and The Milligans ... "Everybody is an Asshole to Somebody Sometimes."

Sort of fits this discussion... however, I do appreciate your comments on my blog and do reciprocate when you make me laugh.

Kirsty said...

There are also some serious crazies out there - and god forbid you express an opinion about someone they like! In my case, it was a 30cm tall little furry man, a meerkat who was unlucky enough to be filmed for a tv show and who is (was) part of my study group for my PhD. WE DID NOT GET ALONG! And when I blogged about that, suddenly I wasn't getting along with a whole lot of ardent meerkat fans! Crazy.

Slyde said...

sybil: of course except us! well, except YOU, anyway...

susan: i hope i make you laugh ALL the time!

kirsty: you're kidding, right? there are meerkat supporters out there?

Marlene said...

I just LOVE it when people follow because you've got a freebie up for grabs...and as soon as they don't win it - poof...they're gone! Grrrr.

Brandy Rose said...

Some bloggers have their own ideas about what blogging courtesy is which most of it, I consider BS. If I enjoy it, I'll follow it. If I have something to say, I'll comment. If not then not.

AlleyCat said...

lol I haven't posted yet, so you can post first (pokes tongue out) :0)

Chris H said...

Yep, I've had all those sorts of 'problems' blogging to.
Lately I only read and comment on blogs about twice a week! I feel bad sometimes about that, but as I now follow over 200 bloggers it's getting really hard to do the rounds.
I'm sure I do eventually get back to your blog... and comment as often as I can ... I dont CARE if you never comment on mine... it is what it is.... fun at the end of the day eh?

Chris H said...

Oh and it bugs the shit outta me when I 'lose' a follower! I don't know why... maybe it leaves me wondering why? What did I do/not do? Sucks .

badgerdaddy said...

Gosh, I remember the early days of this blog... Those were the days, when it was just me and the tumbleweed reading... How times have changed! Not.

Really though, people are strange. And this plus Earl's blog are probably the only two I read regularly any more. I actually do blog still but they're more specialised, and I am delighted to say I have a blog with 0 followers. It makes me laugh every time I read the widget! Because really, who do you blog for? Yourself, of course!

MarkD60 said...

I kept the old style template and don't have the option to follow or be followed. (I don't think, and I don't want to know)
I can relate to this post, and your blog is roughly the same age as mine, I'm sure you're seen it all too.
People are funny, everyone is in the center of their own separate reality.

Slyde said...

marlene: yeah, i didnt win either, and i'm still with ya!

brandy: and thats exactly the way it SHOULD be....

alley: ok, now that you posted first, i will return the favor :)

chrish: hey now... i most certainly DO comment on your posts! i also usually only read everyones blogs once a week or so, so because you post daily i dont comment on everything, but i'm pretty good for at least a weekly comment.

badger: yeah, we've come a long way, baby. Honestly, when you linked your site to mine back in the day, that was pretty much the kickstart to get this blog rolling and seen by ANYONE besides earl.

So i have YOU to thank... do you want to french kiss?

mark: thats really a great way to put it. People can be very self-centered, blog-wise....

radioactive girl said...

I am kind of random at commenting, but I read all the time. I just sometimes feel like I have nothing to say, even if I did enjoy a post. I think I need to make up some kind of code word to leave as a comment in that case so I don't just say either nothing or "I loved that post" when that happens.

Heff said...

Man, If I removed the FIVE fake aliases that I've currently got following your blog, you'd REALLY fall down in a puddle of your own tears, wouldn't you ?!?

meleah rebeccah said...

Oh my gosh, Slyde! Some people are just assholes! Ugh. That burns me up.

I follow your blog, because I enjoy reading it. I comment on your blog, because you make me laugh.

Slyde said...

radio: and thats pretty much the way you SHOULD be doing it, imo...

heff: where the hell did your blog go, you sexy beast?

meleah: see, thats why i comment on your blog, too. That, and i think you are a smokin' hot milf...

badgerdaddy said...

Do you know, looking back, I think maybe I had a lot of readers. Never once thought to look at the stats, or any of that shit. Well, ho hum. It was all good fun.

MarkD60 said...

I added a link from my blog to yours, in my sidebar. Hope you don't mind.

AlleyCat said...

no, YOU posted first lol!

AlleyCat said...

& I can't spell!!! I meant you cant comment first as I hadn't posted!! yep i'm a twit!

Tamara said...

Any volunteers to fulfill your tag wish yet?

I've stopped caring about followers. I don't even have a clue who most of mine are or why they're following me when they don't ever comment.

I almost always comment. Except if it's one of your TV show posts because chances are we're 20 seasons behind you in SA and I've never heard of the show ;-)

Slyde said...

badger: no doubt... i think you were doing just fine with readers...

mark: now im pissed! remove it at once!

alley: i think i need you to start phoning in your comments instead of typing them... i keep picturing you saying all this stuff in that sexy accent :)

tam: nope, not a one. I think you need to step up to the plate and take one for the team....

Tamara said...

Hah! Keep dreaming.

By the way, there's a link on my blog you might find funny. It involves breasts and a snake. Intrigued?

Slyde said...

very... im headed there now!

CPalermo21 said...

Of course, then there's people like me, who just subscribe through RSS and don't count as a follower....

Bless My Bitchy Heart said...

Cool post. I really hate mean comments. Or total obvious self promoting comments! Icky! Sometimes I see comments on blogs that make me rage. Again, love your blog, it always makes me laugh.

Slyde said...

chris: just click the fucking 'follow' button, already!

bitchy: thanks hon.. i love your blog too :)

Jill/Twipply Skwood said...

And then there are those people that would follow and comment on every post as soon it was posted...if only they were better organized...

I mostly have stopped trying to figure this stuff out. Mostly. I hope I'm nice enough about it. But it's also sometimes I have to remind myself that it's a hobby and if I'm feeling a bunch of pressure about reading or commenting, that sort of defeats the purpose of a hobby...

It's funny but I first read that she stopped reading because you didn't have enough FLOWERS. For a split second I figured that seemed like a decent reason not to read - she wanted to read about flowers, and you don't really post about flowers. But then I reread. :-)

Slyde said...

yes, but then she could have just moved on over to SLYDESFLOWERBLOG....(coming soon!)

Kaylen said...

I sometimes get too busy to stay on top of all the blogs I'd like to read each week, so when I do get a comment from someone who I haven't visited in awhile, it's a good reminder for me that I haven't checked in with them for awhile. I would guess my quid-pro-quo comment ratio is low. Much lower than I would like, but I just don't have time AND sometimes I'll click to their blog and be bored by that current days post and then be like, meh, I'll check in tomorrow...
and then I forget.

I probably look at my stats once every 7-8 weeks. My memory doesn't last long enough to remember the last number, so that works well in my favor.

Slyde said...

kaylen: Honestly, thats pretty much how i run things here, and in my posting-on-other-peoples-blogs, almost to a tee.