Friday, October 22, 2010

You’ve Got To Know When To Fold

I’ve got a bit of a confession to make.

For the past few months, I have been slightly obsessed with playing poker.

Specifically, Texas Hold ‘em.

It all started innocently enough…. Some friends organized a poker night over the summer, and it was great fun. I have always enjoyed playing poker, but I’ve never really had the outlet to play it too often.

Then, the strangest thing happened: I found this new invention called The Internet.

And you know what? Aside from housing a remarkably large collection of pornography (which i hear is apparently fairly popular), the intenet also has sites where you can gamble on-line!

Wait, let me get this straight: I can go to the internet, give the friendly computer salesman my credit card, and play 10-Man Texas Hold ‘em WHENEVER I WANT?

Holy Crap this isn’t good.

I’ve been playing on one of these sites,, for about 2 months now, and since I haven’t lost my house in a big pot yet, I think I’ll be playing for awhile longer.

Actually, I haven’t lost THAT much yet, but it’s only a testament to my unbelievably strong will-power (and piercing brown eyes) that I haven’t lost a sinful amount of money so far.

It’s actually an outstanding website. And you can play poker (or blackjack, or anything really) any time you choose. No matter the time of day, there are always THOUSANDS of people on, playing anything from standard poker, to Texas Hold ‘em, to Omaha rules, to whatever. There are literally thousands of variants, letting you always get a game of EXACTLY the kind of poker you want to play.

My current obsession is Double Or Nothing. 10 people play standard Texas Hold ‘em, with a one-time buy-in getting you $1,500 in chips. The catch in this game, however, is that you are not required to be the last man standing. In THIS variant, you only have to be one on the final 5 players at the table to DOUBLE your money! The other five players all get a nice helping of jack and squat.

It REALLY is a very fun way to play. Even if I have come in 6th place (thereby JUST missing the money) a MADDENING amount of times.

Anyway, this weekend I will undoubtedly be online, trying my hand in just ONE more game.

After all, Mini-Me needs his college tuition, doesn’t he?


Heff said...

Thanks for trying to turn me on to something addicting.

Go flop yer pair in the river.

Marlene said...

I have enough of a battle with friendly games like Bejeweled Blitz on facebook......if I got into this crap, I'd be house poor in three days.

I once went to Vegas and blew $400 in one night. ONE night. Yeah, you may not think that's so bad, but when I had budgeted $20 per was more than I wanted to blow! Yikes.

sybil law said...

I would've swooned, but now you just remind me of my husband. Online poker - BAH!

Ashly Star said...

I don't play online but I LOVE getting a group of friends together and playing for a few hours.

Evil Twin's Wife said...

Stuff like that makes me a nervous bert - I wish it didn't. I like to get money, I just don't like to lose it. LOL.

Susan Higgins said...

Oh God... Be careful. Remember, nothing comes without a price.... Good and bad.

Unknown said...

I used to live in Las Vegas. There was an old joke.

A guy came to Vegas in a $50,000 Cadillac and a month later went home in a $200,000 Greyhound bus.

Addiction of any kind is no joke. I hope you make out better than the guy with the Cadillac.

Verdant Earl said...

This is by far your best money-making idea so far, Mr. Kramden.

Anonymous said...

I'm pathetic at poker. I wish I could learn. Except like... I am pathetic at any game that requires your face not to light up when you could win. Because my smile just beams! XD

Good luck and try to restrain when you could lose...

Chris H said...

I love playing Poker,sadly Stew does not. so I look at my poker set often and sulk.
I hope you have earnt Mini Me's tuition by now!

Unknown said...

I have never played. Is their a free site you can learn on? Or better yet, how 'bout I come there and you can teach me in person?

Bruce Johnson said...

Tell me more of this 'pornography' you mention.....sounds interesting.

I have been gambling on line as well, but of a different sort. I have spent the last mont setting up and e-trade account and I am about to buy some stock. Not half of Apple Corp or anything like. Just a few little chips off the cornerstone of capitalism to see how the whole process works. It is gambling.......just for big boys.

meleah rebeccah said...

HA! I am totally obsessed with playing Texas Hold ‘em too! It's so addictive~

Cocaine Princess said...

The only card game I really know how to play is Blackjack.

"just ONE more game"

-Signs of a gambling addict!

Kidding aside- good luck in the game.

Happy Mommy said...

My three year old asked if I was the girl in the picture at the top of this post! Yowser! My kid thinks I'm sexy!

And I LOVE Texas Hold 'Em. Every time I have $400 extra dollars, I head straight to the casino.

Slyde said...

but the real question is...

do you win? :)

Happy Mommy said...

Usually, I do. But also usually, I bring a friend who loses. I almost always go home with the same money I started with, but not until many hours of fun have been well spent. (And I don't just play hold 'em when I'm at the casinos - Black Jack, roulette, and craps - I'm a very lucky girl.

Slyde said...

if you can go home with what you started with, then i consider you 'winning'!

Just like my on-line poker playing. ive been doing it now for about 9 months, and im down about 30 bucks, so i'd consider that a win, too.