As you probably heard, Country Music star/Sausage Maker Jimmy Dean died over the weekend. He was 81.
Honestly, All I know about Jimmy Dean is that a few centuries ago he wrote that song “Big Bad John”, and people down South treat his sausages like they were plasma.
Meet one such gentleman (click the audio link in the story).
Although this call to the Jimmy Dean complaint department happened over 3 years ago, it hit the interwebs big time this weekend and has caught on like wild-fire. I love it.
To set it up a bit, the attached audio clip came from when Texas-bred “Randy” finds out that the Jimmy Dean sausage company has changed the packaging on their sausages from 16 oz to 12 oz.
This call is pure gold. My favorite parts are the beginning, when this knucklehead doesn’t yet realize that he’s being recorded, and the end, when he doesn’t realize that he’s STILL being recorded.
I was about to make a quick bullet-list of everything I find side-splittingly funny about this call, but maybe it’s just better to let you be your own judge. Be warned, it’s slightly NSFW… especially his rant at the end.
All joking aside, I guess what disturbs me most about this call is the fact that this dude and his family actually eat 16 ounces of sausage, two dozen fried eggs, and a t-bone EVERY FUCKING DAY FOR BREAKFAST!!!
On a crazy day, I’ll decide to have a bagel with my orange juice.
But I guess that’s why I maintain the body of an Adonis while it’s probably a safe bet that good Ol’ Randy here has cornered the market on suspenders and stretch pants.
Seriously, what the fuck must his Cholesterol be at if he’s shoveling THAT amount of shit into his gaping maw every day?
5 hours ago