And no, I don’t mean in “that” way…..
I mean in the “Holy Crap I think Michael Jackson just scared the living shit out of my son” way….
Last night, I was playing a computer game with Mini-Me. We recently picked up this cute puzzle game called Plants Vs Zombies. I bought it because, as we all know, zombies are the Shiznit.
PvsZ is this cute game where you build plants in a garden in an effort to try to stop these little cutesy cartoon zombies from walking on your lawn. It’s very addictive, and it’s actually a good problem-solving game for kids. We’ve both been playing it for the better part of a week now.
Anyway, last night we got up to a new level in the game, and one of the cartoon zombies that attacked us was a cute little Michael Jackson/Thriller style zombie. My son had no idea what it was, and when I explained that it was supposed to be MJ, he became curious about it, and wanted to know more about Thriller.
Now, I haven’t seen that video in at least 20 years now. All I really remembered was that the Gloved-One dances around like a pixie, doing a lame-ass choreographed dance for 20 minutes. I figured, that was pretty damn safe for a 7 year old.
So, off to Youtube we went, where I quickly found the video. As it started, I realized that I had COMPLETELY forgotten about the beginning, where MJ is walking his girlfriend through the park, and the full moon starts to rise, and he starts to change.
There is a scene where he sinks under the camera shot, and then POPS back up, now with demon-yellow eyes and fangs.
Well, my friends, it was right at that moment when Mini-Me just about shit his pants with fright.
I really felt bad about it. I totally forgot that that damnable video had a “BOO!” moment in it. Mini-Me went running out of the room, crying his eyes out, screaming for Friz while yelling at me “I’m only seven! Why would you show me that???”
So anyway, it was right at that moment that I knew I was going to be completely FUCKED for sleep last night.
And fucked I was.
Mini-Me woke up about every 2 hours last night, yelling for me.
Michael Jackson is in my room….
Michael Jackson is under my bed…
Michael Jackson is in the bathroom…
And on and on…..
I have to admit, having Michael Jackson under my bed would pretty much scare the bejesus out of me too, and that’s even now that he’s dead.
Anyway, I really feel bad about it, but if it’s any consolation, I am completely paying the price for my stupidity this morning. I am dead to the world, and can barely keep my eyes open.
Since I’ve apparently already destroyed his innocence, I might as well go the Full Monte tonight and just make him watch the Evil Dead trilogy.
Hey, the boy’s got to grow up sometime….
* Was the title of this post inappropriate or offensive? Too soon?
Guess, what? I could give a rat’s ass.
Happy Wednesday, all!
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