Friday, January 16, 2009

The Interview

A few weeks ago, that hot little minx Diva asked people to let her interview them.

Because I somehow thought that this was my ice-breaker to finally get her into bed, I agreed.

Here, ladies and gentlemen, is that interview.

1) Who, in your opinion, is the LAMEST super hero of all time and why?

That’s a good question. Unfortunately I’ve gotta go with the first thought that popped into my perfectly-featured head. For me, the lamest superhero of all time is this guy:

Guess what his name is? I’ll give you a hint…. It’s Slyde.

That’s right, 25 years ago, I got my namesake from a guy whose only super-power was a suit he invented that was coated completely in Teflon, making him so slippery that he was literally untouchable. That was it. That was ALL the super-powers he had. I’m trying really hard to think of someone else, but I don’t think you can get much more pathetic than that.

2) What is the best thing about being a dad - in your experience?

That’s easy. For 6 years now, I just can’t get over the fact that there is this little guy who lives in my house, and his world totally, 100%, revolves around me. All he wants to do in his little life is to make me proud, and to spend time with me. I eat that shit up, and come back for more. He is so completely pure in his intentions and love that he humbles me.

Don’t get me wrong. I know that this age won’t last forever. I know that I’m just a few short years away from the “Dad, Stop it! You’re embarrassing me!” age. All I know is that the first time he tells me that he’d rather go and play with his friends than with me, he’s going to break my heart.

3) Name the top ten movies that you think everyone should watch at least once before they die (please don't say star wars)

Oh, I am so tempted to just list Star Wars 10 times!

But ok, I’ll give this a real shot. Here’s my 10, in no particular order. If I tried to order them, I think my head would explode from the strain. And nobody wants that (except Earl).

-Godfather 1 & 2
-12 Angry Men
-King Kong
-The Matrix
-Lord of the Rings 1, 2, & 3
-Roots (not a movie I know… bite me!)
-Full Metal Jacket
-Usual Suspects

Damn, that was pretty hard. I’m sure an hour for now I’ll think of something that SHOULD be more deserving to be put on this list. Oh well.

4) If you could pick on person, fictional, to hang out with for 24 hours - who would it be and why?

(Note: Because brains aren’t quite my strong suit, I misread this question and picked non-fictional people in my answer. I’m too lazy to change it now. But if you MUST have an answer to the ORIGINAL question as written, I’d probably spend the day with SLYDE, just so I could repeatedly punch him in the nuts for making my namesake so lame).

Well, for this one, I could go a number of ways (did I just admit I go both ways? Shit did I just type that again? Hopefully no one is reading anything that I’m typing in the parentheses!).

For pure sexual gratification, I would have to say Megan Fox. Damn, the things I would do to that girl.

For an informational experience, maybe Lee Harvey Oswald. Just to put the decades old questions to rest.

Oh, who am I kidding? I’d jump in a heartbeat for one more day with my grandfather. I could take him fishing one last time, and give him a proper goodbye.

5) How has your blog changed in the last year?

In the past year, I don’t think it’s changed very much at all.

For sure, it’s gotten a little more popular, but I have all you sexy people to thank for that.

Technically, this year I finally moved away from my custom-made blog and over to Blogger, which has been a big timesaver for me.

Content-wise, I try to post 3 times a week now, which was pretty much unheard of when I first started. Anyone who has been here from the beginning might remember that it wasn’t unusual for me to post 2-3 times a month, instead of each week.

Other than that, what I actually write about hasn’t changed in the past year at all.

If you make the wise decision to visit my site, you can pretty much be guaranteed to be bombarded with juvenile dick and booby jokes, and constant remarks reminding you all how insanely hot I am.

This, my fellow bloggers, is my solemn pledge to you.


Unknown said...

Tee hee. Boobies.

SK Waller said...

That superhero really is pretty lane. Can I hire him to come over and clean out my drains?

Good interview!

Dr Zibbs said...

I can't get into that Lord of the Rings. Maybe I'll give it another shot.

Biscuit said...

Boobies ROCK! Who doesn't love boobies?

When my husband gives me a choice of two things, and I say "I could go either way." he always responds with "I know THAT, but which one do you want?"

Chris H said...

Ah you are a fool... boobs are just NOT that great mate! And as for your movie list, shit I dont't think I have watched even one of them! Chick flicks mate, chick flicks rock! ha ha ha.

Chris H said...

NO hold on, I did watch King Kong! It made me cry cos he died.

Verdant Earl said...

One Kubrick film and it's FMJ? Really?

Faiqa said...

He's slippery. Nobody can catch him because they can't get a grip on him. He can squeeze into small places. He also signifies that anyone can be a superhero with the right technology...superpowers are not a birthright.

It's a metaphor for everyone possessing the ability to achieve the extraordinary....

Yeah. Still. Lame.

Michelle said...

Ahhh, i get it!!!

Oh and booby!!!

Happy Friday!!!!

badgerdaddy said...

You WHAT???? The bear dies at the end of King Kong? No need for me to watch that now. Pffffft.

And yes, you are hot, Slyde. And that is the shittest superhero I've ever heard of - clearly some money from Teflon went into creating it. How sad.

Angie said...

you had me at slippery guys... or is that in a wet kind of way slippery? and then you mentioned boobies... wow.... and yes, I know your waiting for your answer... let's leave it as a maybe for now... you have to catch me in a very VERY good mood for a YES! maybe after the Super bowl when a certain team wins ( fingers crossed)... oxoxoxo

James said...

I always wondered where your blog lame ..sorry name! came from.
Why is everybody talking about boobies? I must have missed something in the interview.

Every lady has's the nipples that make the difference IMO

Lesson from King Kong...if you are king of the Island DON'T get off it for a woman.

Candy's daily Dandy said...

Juvinile dick and boobie jokes, constant remarks reminding us how insanely hot you are-are exactly the reasons why I love you!!:)

Candy's daily Dandy said...

That and the fact that I think you may be an awesome dad!

Anonymous said...

Tiddlypom. :)

Anonymous said...

Does Sailor Mercury count as a superhero? Bubbles? Seriously, that's all you can do, make it cloudy in here?

Tamara said...

Teflon? You picked your name after a dude dressed in Teflon? Dude...

Awesome post. And The Usual Suspects has got to be Kevin Spacey's finest hour. Way before he went the way of Superman Returns and such nonsense. Meh.

Anonymous said...

full out middle school'll need a bigger blog.

Heff said...

My #3 and #4 would both be Forrest Gump, simply because I like to be the smarter of the two when hanging out with a bud.

Bruce Johnson said...

I had always wondered about the name.....a lame all sort of makes perfect sense now.

As for the films: Which King Kong?...I can see the original, but think the two remakes were awful.

Was surprised to see "Full Metal Jacket" in there and "The Usual Suspects"....both exceptional, but a bit obscure for most. I would have dropped "Roots" and inserted "American Beauty".

i am the diva said...

great answers dude.
Seriously, Slyde is a super hero? lol. lame.

Godfather 1&2 - never seen it... it seems boring, but maybe i'll take your word for it.
12 Angry Men - never heard of it?
King Kong - haven't seen the original OR the remake.
The Matrix - yes, seen it many times.
LOTR 123 - yup.
Jaws - yup.
Psycho - the original or the remake? i've seen the remake..meh.
Roots - i haven't seen it. want to though.
Full Metal Jacket - if i've seen it, i don't remember it... wait, that's the Gomer Pile one? i've seen the end of it.
Usual Suspects - YAY! that's a good one, nice to see that one in the list.

Good list! i wondered what would be on there. and for the record, it's not that i don't like Star Wars, it's good and all, i just think it's one of those ones that would end up on EVERYONE's list... so, i should have said: "ASIDE from star wars, what are the top ten" etc.

Tamara said...

Slyde, i just discevered a whole lot of lamer powers to have:

Anonymous said...

Well I wouldn't classify you as slippery & untouchable, but you're certainly impossible to make plans with! LOL!

I can't wait to tell your old friend 'GAR' about this comic book hero that you're nicknamed after. I'm sure he'll get a kick out of it. Have fun you busy bastard!

elizabeth said...

That was great. I think we should all interview each other on a regular basis.