Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Turkey Bits

See what i did there with the title?

This is gonna be a bullet post, and what are "bullet posts" anyway, but little "bits" of information. Plus, since it's Thanksgiving tomorrow here in the States, I masterfully put it all together and came up with title "Turkey Bits".

Damn, that is SO clever! Sometimes, while I'm staring longingly in the mirror at myself, i wonder why God blessed me with not only the perfect face and the body of an Adonis, but also with the razer sharp intellect of a veritable genius. It's almost too much awesomeness for one person to contain.

God made me humble, too. Don't forget humble.

What was I talking about again? Oh yeah, bullets....

- Once again I have to apologize for not reading ANY of your blogs this week. I just checked Google reader and i am behind on about 52 Gazillion blogs. I just don't understand why you people have to be so selfish to continue to post when I am off from work and don't wish to waste my cherished personal time (as opposed to my near-worthless "work" time) to go through all your stuff. Anyway, there is NO way I'll get to them all. Please don't hate me for it, and please don't hate me because I'm beautiful. I promise to resume my regular schedule of leaving 4th-Grade-level comments on all of your blogs next week.

-I have tried to put my recent distrust of all things electronic to rest, and have bought myself a new GPS and am having the Wii fixed. To pay for these new additions to the family, I cashed in my change jar, and with grandpa's contribution, managed to cash in almost $600! Can you believe that shit? That change that you find under your couch cushions after you host a Friday night Swinger's Orgy really DOES add up.

P.S. I'm just using a Swingers Orgy as an example. I'm pretty sure that hosting ANY kind of party at your place will result in finding loose change. I haven't tested that theory yet, but i promise to do so as soon as Swinging and Orgies start to get old for me.

-Today i continued to make a run for my Perfect Dad award and took my son to see Bolt in 3-D. It was pretty fun for the little tyke, but i cant help but feel glum that in the course of a little more than a decade, John Travolta has gone from a bad-ass hit man in Pulp Fiction to a 3-D cartoon dog that misses his owner. Then again, before that he starred in THREE "Look Who's Talking" movies so maybe he's just finally come full circle.

-After being hounded by friends week after week over the fact that no one can believe that I am not on Facebook, I finally took the plunge and registered.

My God! Within 2 hours i was getting friends requests by people i haven't seen in Eons! Old school buddies, girlfriends.... it's been a veritable walk down memory lane. And kinda fun, too. If any of you are registered (which is probably most of you), do please look me up. I want to add more friends. I'm kinda vain like that (hard to believe, right?).

-As i said, tomorrow is Thanksgiving. Not one of my favorite holidays, but it's a day off work so I'll fucking take it. I actually have an old tradition that i used to do as a kid, and i seem to have passed it on to my son.

Tomorrow morning while we watch the Macy's day parade, we will sit with paper and crayons in hand and draw a picture of a pilgrim, which we then put on the refrigerator while we enjoy our Thanksgiving dinner. I'm not sure how i started that back when i was wee little Slyde, but i actually am kinda tickled that my son has picked it up.

Maybe Thanksgiving isn't too bad after all.

Happy Thanksgiving, everybody.


Ali said...

That title was so witty! You are nothing if not a connoisseur of the English language.

I am in literal TEARS that I've received no comments from you this week, by the way. I hope you're happy :(

You know the really sad part about all those "Look Who's Talking" movies? Last night I realized that not only was I watching "Look Who's Talking Too" - but that I had made it half way through the movie!!! As soon as I came to my senses I immediately turned the tv off and went to bed...but I have to admit...Johnny was lookin' pretty hot back then.

Happy Thanksgiving Slyde! Enjoy all the drawing with the wee one.

Anonymous said...

Now I don't feel so guilty about not having caught up on your blog for the past month or so.

You is on Facebook? I don't believe you...

As a foreigner I always wondered what Americans actually thought of Thanksgiving. Bloggers only ever seem to put up pics of pumpkin pies and talk about sitting around watching footy with their pants undone - and yet it's such a bizarre holiday - from this side of the world anyway.

AlleyCat Runs said...

Happy Thanksgiving Mr Genius :0)

Verdant Earl said...

You know, I can understand you taking a break from other people's blogs. But you should still be constantly checking mine for new posts every hour or so.

It's like I don't even know you any more.

Mrs. Hall said...

Well, if you are to read one post that you have missed. Read this one. If not for the cute pix of my oh so cute son.

Other than than, not much happening over at the Mrs. Hall.

Happy Turkey Bits day!



James said...

Happy Thanksgiving Slyde.

By the way I sent you an email about boardgames and the Other Thing. But my email has gone all stupid it may have a strange date on it like 2001 or something. Hope you can find it because I can't talk about that thing over again.

cheers James in England

Anonymous said...

I feel the same way! Damned overachievers! lol

Tamara said...

No! You gave up and registered on FB?!?!?! Now I am all alone in my refusal to do so.

Michelle said...

Hi Slyde,

Ok, now that i got that out of the way, i want to friend you on facebook, how can i find you dude?

I am off to run a turkey trot 5 miler in prospect park!!

Then, i eat!!!

Suzi Q said...

You signed up for Crack Book? I'm disappointed. I'm still boycotting. Happy Thanksgiving anyway.

Slyde said...

ali: See, i need more chicks like you here to boost my ego more!

artful: you havent been here for a month? come on over here so i can give you a good spanking!

alleycat: more praise! thanks!

earl: maybe i'm finally transforming into a butterfly.

Slyde said...

mrs hall: your daughter is beautiful.. just like her mother..

james: i got your email and already responded. hope you recieved it.

honeywine: another convert! yay!

Tamara: i tried to fight the good fight, Tam, but the masses were too strong for me.

michele: Search on Andrew DiGregorio. I'll pop up.

paige: as i said above, i just couldnt take friends asking me to do it anymore. i caved.

Mrs. Hall said...

Well, technically, it's my son. But yeah, I get that a lot.

What with his cute little curls!

but, yeah, very adorable my little man.



Faiqa said...

Happy Thanksgiving... and good for you and having a life.
Listen, don't get mad, but you know how you sometimes, when referring to yourself write "i" and then others you write "I"? Is there some sort of code there or is it just random?

Anonymous said...

Happy Thanksgiving to you, Slyde!!

Unknown said...

People ARE selfish.. how dare they post so much shit when theres no way in the world to keep up with it all..

I hope you had a great day... I am opn a wine and tequila buzz.. so i hope this post foesnt have too many tiops

Chris H said...

Happy Thanksgiving.... so glad we don't do it here! I so do not need all that friggin turkey and stuffing and what not!

Anonymous said...

I'm behind on all my reads too! I hope your day was wonderful. You should post your traditional turkey drawings when you get the chance. See if we can tell which is yours and which is mini-Slyde's. LOL. Enjoy your time! :)

SK Waller said...

Well, I'd love to add you in Facebook, but I don't know how to find you. Email me:

Caz said...

"the razer sharp intellect of a veritable genius"
Ok einstein, were you simply being ironic with your spelling of razor?
hahahaha ;)

Anonymous said...


Unknown said...

Hey, don't be knocking my Johnny T. He is ALL that and then some mister.! But okay, he can't touch you with a 10 foot pole! LOL And I been wondering why you havne't been around. I though you found a new girlfriend to have an orgy with! LOL I'm on facebook, too. I can't remember my freaking name, or homepage, or what the fuck ever, becaues I'm not even sure what to do with that shit!