Monday, August 04, 2008

Meme Madness

The lovely and talented Teeni has cyberneticlly assaulted me with a meme. Normally I avoid these like the plague, because Lord knows I talk about how great I am enough on these pages as it is.

But, since this particular one revolves more around Friz than my lovely self, I figured I’d give it a go.

So, heeeeeeere we go……………

1. What is her name?
Didn’t I JUST say it was “Friz”? I just said it not two paragraphs earlier. Aren’t you listening?

2. Who eats more?
If we’re talking about a normal meal, probably her, but what I DON’T eat during one of my 3 meals a day I MORE than make up for with snacks like pretzels and Doritos. I really do think I could live on the stuff.

3. Who said, “I love you” first?
Oh God, this isn’t going to turn into one of those lovey-dovey memes is it? If so, I am outta here. At any rate, I honestly don’t remember, but I’m going to guess it was Friz.

4. Who is taller?
By some genetic freak of fate and chance, we are EXACTLY the same height. That bothers Friz who, because of this, says she can’t wear high heels when we go out, which I have always thought was one of the stupidest arguments for not wearing F-ME pumps that I have ever heard.

5. Who drives most when you are out together?
She does, because she is the world WORST backseat driver ever invented, so I have learned over the years to just get in the passenger seat, and let her think whichever damn way she decides to get where we’re going really IS the best way to get there. It’s probably added years to my life.

6. Who is more sensitive?
Honestly, that’s probably me. At least it’s true in the sense that I definitely get offended more easily.

7. Who does the laundry?
Are you kidding me? I’m all MAN, baby! Believe me; no human on this earth would want to wear any laundry that I had a hand in cleaning. I had to do my own laundry when I was in college, and usually by the time November rolled around each year, everything I owned had been bleached to the same color.

8. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed?
I do. Which pisses me off to no end, because we have one of those huge honkin’ king-sized beds that barely fit into our bedroom, so we only could fit ONE end table on ONE side of the bed. Two fucking points if you can guess WHICH side of the bed has the end table? I’ll give you a hint: It’s not the right. So I lay in bed each night, without the ability to turn the lights on or off, or see what time it is. Seriously.

9. Who pays the bills?
She does. See # 5. She is way too compulsive to trust me with paying the mortgage, which is probably for the best because I’d almost certainly fuck it up.

10. Who cooks more?
I can cook: 1) toast 2) bagels, 3) cereal 4) Mac and Cheese. So unless you’re happy eating from THOSE 4 basic food groups for the rest of your life, you’d probably better be doing the cooking if we decide to live together. Friz is an uber-cook. I’m barely even ALLOWED in our kitchen, which really suits me just fine.

11. Who is more stubborn?
Without question, me. I can honestly say with some misplaced pride that I’m probably the most stubborn person I know.

12. Who is the first to admit they are wrong?
See # 11. It’s kind of become a running joke with us, but I don’t think I’ve EVER admitted I was wrong. And I’m pretty sure I HAVE been. Once. Kinda.

13. Who has more siblings?
Friz’s brother unfortunately passed away 10 years ago, and I am an only child. Did anyone ever think for a second that someone with my ego had siblings? No way, Jose. I am 100 % completely a product of my parents and grandparents telling me how special I am for my entire life.

14. Who wears the pants in the relationship?
That would be me. Friz is a pushover. If I didn’t enforce discipline there would be chaos! Nothing in their place, no organization, dogs and cats living together… it would be anarchy!

15. What do you like to do together?
We hang with friends a lot and get alittle crazy, but when it’s just the two of us we’re pretty boring. If you could be a fly on the wall when we were home alone, expect to see a lot of us watching TV and reading.

16. Who eats more sweets?
No question, that would be me. I’m a glutton for them tasty treats.

17. Guilty Pleasures?
American Idol. At least that’s the only thing in my life that I feel guilty about participating in.

18. How did you meet?
At work. She threw herself at me. It happens a lot.

19. Who asked whom out first?
That would be me. How many times do I have to tell you that I’m all man?

20. Who kissed who first?
If I remembered the answer to this, I should have my He-Man Woman Haters Club membership revoked.

21. Who proposed?
Me. On Christmas Eve. Cliché, I know. Bite me.

22. Her best features and qualities?
She’s got a great laugh, and she’s enough of an angel to put up with all the worst kinds of shit I can throw at her, day after day. Plus, she has great legs.

23. Tag some peeps.
I will tag no one! The meme madness must end here!


SK Waller said...

Okay. I'll steal this one, but only because it didn't turn all sappy and stupid like those MySpace surveys.

Anonymous said...

Aw, this was awesome, Slyde! I love your answers! These are such a hoot to read! Some of the answers surprised me like that she drives more but I guess you are right - you have to pick your battles. LOL. Thanks so much for playing along. Hope you had fun with it too. Oh, and btw, my Meez is now wearing a dunce cap (well, it's some kind of stupid hat - closest I could find) thanks to you because I didn't at first get your comment at my site. LOL

Unknown said...

Oh come on, I thought you did a GREAT job! and ya know, I do most of the driving, too, cause honestly, my husband can not drive worth a damn! I mean, he slows down at green lights "just in case" and it takes him like 10 seconds to take off when the light goes from red to green. DRIVES ME CRAZY!

Slyde said...

steph: agreed.. the myspace ones are the worst!

teeni: lol! you just made me laugh... when i went back to your site and read what you wrote i was like "what the heck is she talking about?"... it took me a minute to figure out what you meant..

bina: yeah, we are cut from the same cloth. Friz says i drive like a crazy person (another reason i just let her do it.)

Bruce Johnson said...

A special. It is just like being back on MySpace.


Anonymous said...

Christmas Eve...aaawwww...somebody is just a big ole softy! Oh yeah, guys don't like that turn of phrase. heehee I'm with you on women doing the laundry. Until M. and I were married I thought his socks were gray when he bought them.

Verdant Earl said...

Wait a minute. Be honest. You let Friz drive because you never know where you are going! Or has your sense of direction (and adventure) gotten better over the years.

Chris H said...

You are "all man" yet you let her drive? WEIRD... nice meme... well done.

Sweets said...

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww so sweet :)

why do i find it funny that you like Idol? hehe

Anonymous said...

earls dead on, unless you got a gps!

Anonymous said...

btw, wheres the Wiz?

Slyde said...

lotus: im sure you dont hate myspace HALF as much as i do..

honey: shhhh, dont tell anyone my secret...

earl: my sense of direction? no. My sense of adventure? by leaps and bounds...

Slyde said...

chris h: i know when to pick my battles, hon.

sweets: i dont LIKE idol.. i just cant fucking stop watching it!

abes: bite me!

Suzi Q said...

OMG! Just give me a minute to stop laughing so I can leave my comment... You're an only child! I knew there was something I liked about you! But you let her drive?! And pay the bills?! I honestly don't know why I find that so funny.

eyes_only4him said...

Holy shit, for a while I thought u were my husband because holy shit, this could be him..

but he does fact he is the grill master here and is also a baker..

I think my missing ovarie landed in his nut sack.

thanks 4 stopping by...

you kinda crack my shit up, so i will be back..

Slyde said...

paige: im glad i could be the source of your amusement.

flip flip: im starting to think there are more husbands out there like me than i thought... maybe we should form a support group..

Unknown said...

I've never heard of Maria so I googled her. Wow! She really looks different in real life than in that movie! I guess they had to try and make her look like the original, which they actually did a really good job, but still, I like the original girl!

elizabeth said...

And here I was hoping someone somewhere would show me the love and tag me.

Good answers. I like mac and cheese (home made correct, lol)

Verdant Earl said...

Hey, we're the top commentors on each others sites. sweet!

elizabeth said...

Oh. You are such a girl earl. (How many comments can I make so that I AM NUMBER ONE??)

elizabeth said...

This does not appear to be working for me... I think you boys were just meant to be together. Awww.

Anonymous said...

I think earl gets a 2 for 1 post rating...

Tamara said...

On number 8... get a watch with glow in the dark hands.

As for the laundry, this is an age-old trick that seems to fool most women - men pretend they can't figure out how the washing machine / tumble drier / iron / dishwasher etc works simply to avoid ever having to lift a finger.

Slyde said...

bina: Maria Bello is my future girlfriend...

liz: sorry, i dont tag as a rule, but consider yourself tagged!

earl: thats because you love me..

Slyde said...

abes: maybe 3 for 1.

Tamara: shhhhh, you'll blow my secret!

elizabeth said...

You tagged me? Moi? *flutters eyelashes and clasps hands to side of face* I will get right to it!

Slyde said...

liz: get on it, girl... btw love the new avatar pic!