Tuesday, March 27, 2007

I Remember Meme

Ok, I usually avoid these things like the plague, but my dear close friend who I have never met, Anna-banana, has "tagged" me, so here goes...

3 Things That Scare Me: Getting Old, Family Members Dieing, Heights
3 People Who Make Me Laugh: Earl, Brian Regan, Larry David
3 Things I Love: Saturdays where I don't have to do a DAMN thing, Christmas Eve, My son laughing
3 Things I Hate: Bigotry, Red-tape, Nascar
3 Things I Don't Understand: Nascar (see above. How fucking hard can it be to slam my foot on the gas and drive in a circle?), My tax forms, a car engine (I'm such a girly man..)
3 Things I'm Doing Right Now: Tivo-ing Survivor, Listening to my audio book, Putting my son to bed (in like 5 mins...)
3 Things I Want To Do Before I Die: Go to Japan, Become a Millionaire, Join the underground Thai illegal street fighting circuit and kill my way to become Bloodsport Champion.....
3 Things I Can Do: Fix Computers, Play any video game instantly like a Grandmaster, Fight Mike Tyson (yeah, I can do that... he'd just kick my ass, is all...)
3 Things I Can't Do: Fix a Car, Watch more than 1 inning of Baseball without being bored shitless, Sleep thru the night without something waking me the fuck up.
3 Things I Think You Should Listen To: Marion Raven (you knew that was comming), Weezer, Me singing in the shower (that's for YOU, ladies....)
3 Things You Should Never Listen To: Racists, Right-Wing Republicans, Earl singing in the shower (he just sings so much louder than me and drowns me out... wait, what?)
3 Things I'd Like To Learn: Italian (I can speak it, but not well enough to suit my family), to control my temper, How to better handle being this damn good looking
3 Shows I Watched As A Kid: The Dukes of Hazard (which is weird considering my hatred of all things Nascar), The Incredible Hulk, Super-Friends
3 Bloggers I've tagged: I will choose to tag No-one. Pretty much everyone I know has already been tagged, anyway.....

There. Happy now, Blondie? Now go fix your damn computer so you can start posting in the forums again!

Sunday, March 25, 2007

What I'm Reading - March 2007


I have been an avid devourer of all things "Stephen King" for about 20 years now. Through some of his best books like The Stand (maybe my favorite book of all time) and It, to some of his lesser fare such as From a Buick 8 and Dolores Claiborne, I can say with 100 no-bullshitting that I have read every single Stephen King book ever!

So, it shouldn't come as any surprise that I decided to pick up the Master of Horror's latest, Lisey's Story.

When this book came out, I was SUPER-Skeptical. It was billed as "Stephen King's first love story". I wasn't exactly anxious to read a Harlequin Romance novel, but, being that it came from Mr. King, and the OCD part of my brain would probably read Mr. King's grocery list at this point, I decided to give this book a try.

To make this short, I am not really digging it.

First off, the good. It is NOT a love story. Not really. Although Lisey, a grieving widow and central character of the book, spends most of the book remembering times in her life with her dead husband, King manages to swerve the book back to familiar territory for him; Namely psychopathic killers, self-mutilation, and an alternate world.

And that, in a nutshell, is part of this book's problem. It simply doesn't know what kind of book it should be. Supernatural Thriller, or Love Story? It's a little of both, and I for one aren't finding the mix to be working out too well.

In short, if you are a King fan, as I am, then nothing I say about this will encourage or dissuade you from reading Lisey's Story. But if you are "on the fence", I'd say don't jump.

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Meet My New Wife

Or at least my new mistress. At least, she will be... she just doesn't know it yet.

Does anyone know much about this chick? Her name is Marion Raven, and supposedly she is a pretty big Norwegian pop star.

Before I saw this video, I had never seen nor heard of her before, but she is definitely ranking quite high this week on my "Hottie-Boom-Bottie" meter..

I have been obsessing over this song and video all week. My OCD is starting to take over.

I can see the signs now:

1) Listen to this non-stop for the next week
2) Download song onto my IPOD
3) Start to hum song in my sleep, while I dream about the all-women orgy from the video.
4) Begin to stalk her, hiding in my car outside her home and digging thru her garbage in the wee hours of the night.
5) Get slapped with restraining order
6) Propose.

It's really a fairytale romance.....


Tuesday, March 13, 2007

300 Rules


So, I'm at work on Friday, attempting to be a contributing member of society, when who happens to call upon me, but the lovely and talented Earl.

"What are you doing?", he says, all happy as a clam. (If he really was a clam, my guess is he'd be a piss-clam, but you'd have to head on over to his site to learn more about that....)

"Working", I say. "What do you think I'd be doing on a Friday afternoon?"

"Let's go see the new movie, 300!", says he.

"But I have to work! I can't be irresponsible and leave my job just to fulfill my basest fanboy fantasies and head out to watch a kick-ass "guy-movie"!"

"C'mon, who's gonna know?", he needles.

......

Cut to 20 minutes later, when I use the back entrance of my job to sneak out like a teenage girl after curfew and meet up with Earl to see 300.

My god, was it worth it.

That movie just completely rocked. If you like action movies, and don't mind blood and guts, and have a pair of testicles, I URGE you to skip work tomorrow and see this film.

Did I mention that I loved it?

And before Earl goes all "Misery" on me, screaming like a sissy-mary on the forums that things didn't go down EXACTLY like I described, let me cut you off at the pass and say that I used a TEENSY bit of literary licence. I'm just bitter that while I trudge off to work every day, you sit around watching Buffy re-runs while eating chicken-pot-pie in your underwear.

Allow me my small victory, if you please....

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Macs Are Gay

I know, it has been an ungodly amount of time since my last update, and truth to tell, this isn't really much of one either, but in my defense, I have been really busy (i.e. Playing Red Steel on my Wii) to have time to update the ol' blog.

I mean, I have started to write about 3 different stories in the past 2 weeks, and then stopped halfway thru thinking, "Who the Holy Hell would want to read this drivel?" Not me, that's for sure. Which is pretty fucking sad, when you think about it, since I'm the poor sap writing it.

So, if I write a story that I think is too boring for myself, how could I in good conscience pass it off to you good people?

Anyway, to completely get off the topic:

I LOVE the mac vs pc commercials that have been all over the airwaves for the past year or so. They always crack me up (even if they bust on the pc pretty badly, and the pc is my bro', ya know).

But there are some really great spoofs of those commercials on youtube, and this one is gave me a good laugh....

anyway, enjoy! (and i promise to actually write something of substance soon)....